Washington – Note to new parents: You don’t really need all that stuff.
As you get ready for your first baby, you are going to see some very long checklists of supposed essentials. You should know that most of these things are optional. Which is especially lucky for you who live in smaller spaces.
Here’s a list of some of the things you can live without.
* Changing table. If you have a regular table or a bureau or anything with a flat surface, then you have your changing table. Done. Investing in an actual changing table is unnecessary not only because it’s really just a glorified tabletop, but also because you’re not going to be anywhere near the changing table half the times that the baby needs to be changed. You will change the baby in every room of your home, on the couch, on the floor, in your car, in restaurants, on airplanes. And you’ll manage without a changing table.
* Diaper bag. No one ever said that baby gear had to be carried around in ugly vinyl bags with an abundance of compartments. You’ll need to carry some sort of bag large enough to hold nappies and wipes and maybe bottles, but any old bag will do. If you must get a new bag, you’re probably better off with a basic tote, which you can continue to use long after the nappies and bottles are gone.
* Nappy pail. As a new parent, you will have to empty the trash more often than you might if it weren’t full of dirty nappies, but isn’t that more sanitary than investing in something that promises to contain the odor of days-old human waste? Just take your garbage out. It’s so much easier than buying special bags and a bulky plastic container for those bags.
* Nappy stacker. Millions of parents have gotten their children through years of nappies and toilet training without even being aware that there exists a piece of storage equipment designed specifically for nappies. Keep it that way. You can figure out how to store your nappies without it. (Drawers, shelves, baskets and the aforementioned tote bag, for instance.)
* Baby swing. Maybe you’ve heard some parents swear by this infant entertainment system. But if you don’t get it, you’ll probably never miss it, and neither will the baby. It takes up a ton of space, and a smaller bouncy chair will probably do the same trick.
* Baby shoes. When the baby can’t yet walk, shoes are not only unnecessary, they’re bothersome. Soon enough you’ll have an actual walking kid who finds a way to consistently leave two matching shoes in opposite corners of the house, making each and every school-day morning frenetic. Skip the shoes for now.
* Baby monitor. Unless you have an exceptionally large home, plan on throwing exceptionally noisy parties or are an exceptionally easygoing new parent, either you will hear your newborn cry from another part of the home or you’ll be frequently checking in on the child the way paranoid new parents tend to do. There may come a time down the road when the monitor makes sense but starting off, you can live without this.
* Wipe warmer. There are so many questions about this device: Do you keep it on all the time, and if so, don’t the wipes burn? Or dry out? And how cold are wipes stored at room temperature, anyway? It’s more of a hassle than a convenience. Plus, do you really want your kid to get used to warmed-up wipes?
* Bassinet. It’s perfectly reasonable to use a bassinet in those early weeks, because it’s cozier than a crib and can keep your newborn nearby. But it’s not essential. A bassinet is a piece of furniture with a very short shelf life.
* Parenting books. Of course you want to absorb all there is to know about being a good parent. In reality, you’ll learn the most in the early days from grandparents, fellow new parents and, of course, the baby. Babies have a way of teaching you how to be a parent. When you get into more specialised areas of parenting, say sleep training, you’ll soon discover that five different books propose five different approaches. You’ll stack all the books on the changing table that you never use and follow your instinct.
Unless you’re signing up for some version of extreme parenting, you probably won’t be able to live without a crib, a stroller or a car seat if you have a car.
But if you want to avoid the accumulation of bulky, probably overpriced, often plastic items, restrain from accumulating all the extras. You’ll spare yourself a lot of clutter and a lot of time spent freecycling in the not-too-distant future.
(And speaking of the not-too-distant future, you can skip the toddler bed, too.)
Washington Post-Bloomberg
* Andrea Orr is a Washington writer and mother to a 7-year-old daughter.